Who AM I Now??!

When a child gets a catastrophic medical diagnosis the parent’s identity gets disrupted.

It’s no longer anchored in the same well-defined groups and associations as before.

• Because caregiver responsibilities are significantly different than those of other parents, HOW (and if) belonging happens changes.

Because of time constraints but also because of different needs, interests, and priorities, it’s easy to get isolated.

And it’s easy to beat yourself up thinking about not doing and beingthe same as before…

— All the things you’re no longer getting done...

— All the people with whom you’ve lost connection…

At the same time you know it’s impossible to be the same person because life is irrevocably and fundamentally different.

• You’re on a journey creating the best new normal you can muster.

And giving yourself grace as you adapt will help you cope better.

As you make mistakes and do it messy.

As you make the most of each day—

• through tears of grief for the life you anticipated…
• anger for how impossible a hand you were dealt…
• and terror of the future.

All of this is normal.

It’s okay to feel scared.

Inadequate.

Alone…

But you’re not alone.

• You can find the others who know what you know… create your haven.

You don’t have to figure out everything today and you don’t have to do it alone.

You are becoming the parent your child needs you to be.

You’ve got this.

—Julie